I wish life had little blips of pornography
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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