it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Randomize