in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
