..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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