literally had 100 drinks last night.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
