too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
