Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
How external is "for external use only"?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
