Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
