Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
