yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
