he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize