she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
