Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Randomize
