adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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