my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
