She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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