I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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