I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
