you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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