first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
you would pick up someone in the library
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
