My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
