fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
