In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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