it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
