I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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