When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
