My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
we're making bets on your personal life
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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