Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
