He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
