Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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