Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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