Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
We have so much sex to catch up on
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
