You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
