to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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