He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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