We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
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