who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
