Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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