It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
