mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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