Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
