sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
this hospital has no fireball
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
