Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
