I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
