his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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