Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I look excited, but its just a facade.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
