I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
