Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
