So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
