these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
