O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize